Crazy Dream

I am not sure how to connect this with my drive and passion to be a Midwife however, I had a dream that made me think of how I might react to a pre-termer.

I remember being at a birth at a hospital with a really cute young Asian couple. Momma was pushing and I was helping coach her through it and she did a miraculous job. I see the baby being put on the warming table and all of a sudden mom is dressed and ready to go. Momma and daddy are standing next to the baby with the nurse and I walk over to join them, realizing that the baby nurse was a really good friend of mine. I congratulate the parents on their new bundle of joy and join in on the gawking. hehe. 

After I finished oohing and awing, it seemed that reality had hit me and I noticed something was off about the little baby. She sure was beautiful, had all ten fingers and ten toes, even had a beautiful glow about her. After I shook her little hand, caressed her little toes,smiled at the family as they were leaving. I asked my friend the baby nurse, "How old is this baby?" She told me she was 26 weeks and then I just started balling. The baby nurse then said, " yeah some people have a hard time with this." I knew what she meant at least in my dream mind, I knew she was talking about, abortion. 

It was as if the room had changed from celebration to mourning. I asked my friend to excuse me and walked over to a bench in the room and continued to cry, mourning the loss of many little souls.  And woke up with this heaviness on my heart. 

Crazy dream! It was too much like real life for me. This special little baby was fine and in great hands, but I just went into this place of mourning. What a way to kill a mood! Good thing the parents walked out before I started making a scene.Smiles.

On a positive and progressive note, I received my major map for school and I am sending back my financial agreement. Then the learning starts, May 5th is the day classes begin. Right now I am also trying to look into all these different scholarships and to my surprize there are quite a few. I am going to just try for every one, in-between being a mommy, wife, daughter, friend, and employee. What fun, I can't wait to get started! ttfn :)

Update: It is fun going back and reflecting on what you write. This is interesting to me, the connection that I had made in this dream. Thinking and reading this in my concious mind I would think so I have an issue with pre-termers but no somehow I jumped all the way to abortion. Interesting. But I can remember feeling this way and not knowing how to adjust in this dream.